Ah, Legoland. The place of hopes, dreams and refillable drinks cups. I have -finally- been there. And when I say I, I of course mean myself and Lawrence. And my step sister. She came along for the ride too. The glorious, glorious ride.
I’ll start at the beginning.
Saturday 13th July early o’clock
The alarm makes a racket at 4:15am. I’m already awake like a child at Christmas who’s convinced she’ll catch Santa in the act (he’s quite the nimble chap). The taxi toots, I race down the stairs, hop in the back, catch my reflection in the rear view mirror and stop grinning.
I failed the dangerous items declaration at the do-it-yourself check in thing. A personal low.
Saturday 13th July 10am
I arrive in London. It’s stupidly hot and my flight was delayed. I already want to punch a tourist. That probably would only delay my arrival to Legoland so I avoided it and headed on down to the train station.
Who knew that Windsor (a place that was only an hour away) would also be boiling hot. Now slightly damp, we dodge in and out of the folk gazing in admiration at the castle, at the amount of tat being sold outside shops and at the weird royal family mural of a phone box to the first bus stop we could find.
Turns out if the bus driver says Legoland is the second stop he doesn’t mean the actual second stop. He’s also had a funectamy.
Saturday 13th July 1.24pm
We arrived. We stare at it for a while. We edge closer to the gates. Lawrence gets into position.
Hdrhnkjvddbjjbv (@ Legoland w/ 5 others) [pic]: http://t.co/E6oobxftUn
— Jen Rankine (@Censored_Pixel) July 13, 2013
Saturday 13th July 1.32pm
Chaos descends. Memory is blurred. Took photos (and videos) instead. Obvs.
Oh, and it turns out that if you speak really nice to the folks behind the driving school counter, us ‘grown ups’ can get a driving license too. Brilliant.
Saturday 13th July 5pm(ish)
Anyone who knows me will be aware that I have porcelain skin. I’m pretty much see-through. Annoyingly I had to leave early ’cause 31 degree heat and expensive bottles of water lead me to being grouchy and a tad delirious. But at least the bus stops were lego-ified.
I go to bed in my less-than-average hotel room happy and with a headache.
Sunday 14th July 7.30am
Photo-shoot day. Turns out that these are quite fun and models are pretty awesome people. Who knew they were human? Just beautiful humans. Ho hum.
And who knew you could make such awesome stuff out of cardboard? Stuff that you could actually get people inside and make move. Talented gits. Lawrence proceeded to invade the set.
Sunday 14th July 6pm
I decided to play a game with airport security.
Can I get through airport security with a cardboard ray gun? Find out in half an hour.
— Jen Rankine (@Censored_Pixel) July 14, 2013
After convincing the chaps behind the scanning machines of power that I could also hold a banana under a jacket and it would look the same as a cardboard ray gun, they let me take my small trophy through.
After a little bit of banter with airport security, the answer is yes. Yes you can get a cardboard gun through.
— Jen Rankine (@Censored_Pixel) July 14, 2013
It’s the small victories in life that you’ve got to treasure.
